I live your dream
Aug. 31st, 2001 01:04 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
bjornwildeDream time again...
Okay so this morning I had another weird dream. This one was kinda like the Movie Lake Placid. I had moved to a "Hippy/Pagan" comune with some child of mine. I think it was more of a break from City life not a perminate move. Anyway we were acepted with "perfect love". I move into a cottage and in the process of unpacking an alligator comes. It is chasing me and my child till I throw some food at it and it goes away.
Next thing I know it's grown to giant perportions like the aligator in Lake Placid. It goes on a rampage and several people from the comune get hurt. Eventually the critter gets traped into a pickle jar, don't ask me how. The leader of the comune packs everyone up and deserts me and my child in quite a huff of anger. As they are leaving I say "So much for perfect Love."
After they leave I throw the pickle jar into the lake and the alegator gets free. Then I wake up.
Reality.
I find myself trying to figure out why I drink. I know I like the taste. I know I like drinking with friends. Sometimes I drink to take a break from things. Not to make them go away, just to get away from them for a while. In the past I have drunk to feel something. I have drunk when I was depressed and I have drunk out of boredom. I know I like drinking by myself, it's a way to give myself a treat.
But what is the underlying reason I drink? I have lots of answers with not real truth. I know there are times I don't want to drink, like now. I know I don't want to never drink again. I know I can not do the AA thing, been there didn't drink the KoolAid. Hrmmmm.
SD-7 though. And I am feeling better today. My shoulders hurt from doing Tae-Bo yesterday though.
I am also being tempted to fast for a while. Clean out the system and all.
And now for something different. I find myself really liking the idea of running or playing in a "Gaslight" game of Changeling, i.e. Changelings at the turn of the century.
Do any of you find you pick the mood by the Emoticon more then the word for the mood?
Time to go work.
Okay so this morning I had another weird dream. This one was kinda like the Movie Lake Placid. I had moved to a "Hippy/Pagan" comune with some child of mine. I think it was more of a break from City life not a perminate move. Anyway we were acepted with "perfect love". I move into a cottage and in the process of unpacking an alligator comes. It is chasing me and my child till I throw some food at it and it goes away.
Next thing I know it's grown to giant perportions like the aligator in Lake Placid. It goes on a rampage and several people from the comune get hurt. Eventually the critter gets traped into a pickle jar, don't ask me how. The leader of the comune packs everyone up and deserts me and my child in quite a huff of anger. As they are leaving I say "So much for perfect Love."
After they leave I throw the pickle jar into the lake and the alegator gets free. Then I wake up.
Reality.
I find myself trying to figure out why I drink. I know I like the taste. I know I like drinking with friends. Sometimes I drink to take a break from things. Not to make them go away, just to get away from them for a while. In the past I have drunk to feel something. I have drunk when I was depressed and I have drunk out of boredom. I know I like drinking by myself, it's a way to give myself a treat.
But what is the underlying reason I drink? I have lots of answers with not real truth. I know there are times I don't want to drink, like now. I know I don't want to never drink again. I know I can not do the AA thing, been there didn't drink the KoolAid. Hrmmmm.
SD-7 though. And I am feeling better today. My shoulders hurt from doing Tae-Bo yesterday though.
I am also being tempted to fast for a while. Clean out the system and all.
And now for something different. I find myself really liking the idea of running or playing in a "Gaslight" game of Changeling, i.e. Changelings at the turn of the century.
Do any of you find you pick the mood by the Emoticon more then the word for the mood?
Time to go work.
